Picture this:
You’re on “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire” and you’ve just selected answer “D. No”. Regis (RIP you sweet little old man) asks you, “is that your final answer?” The music swells and he asks “are you sure? Not ‘C. Find another way’?” You consider his offer but respond by saying “yes - final answer”. Regis gets so sad as he informs you, “You will not be a millionaire today.”
This is my quirky way to tell you: don’t let no be your final answer.
When Dane and I were house hunting, we heard no 5 times before our offer was accepted on our current home. What if we would’ve stopped at that first no? What would we have done? Declare “Ope guess this isn’t for us. We failed at buying a house so we’ll never try to buy a house again.”
Now take out our home buying example and put in something you’ve tried or wanted to try lately.
Let’s say you’ve been wanting to start a blog. You tell your coworker “I’m thinking about starting a blog about snails!” To which your creatively blocked and scarcity mindset coworker says “omg why would you do that?! Blogs are so hard, not profitable, who would even read that anyway?” And like a snail, what do you want to do? Shrivel up and die because you’re mortified.
You make this into a story about how “no one” will ever read your blog. You start to let the voice of your fearful coworker take over and convince you and your ego that she is right and you might as well not try..
We wouldn’t have let one (let alone 5) “no’s” stop us from honoring our dream of buying our first house. You shouldn’t let the first sign of “no” stop you from doing what you want to do.
Here’s what I want you to do if you get a “no” in your creative and entrepreneurial endeavors:
Check the source of the no: does this person have control over you? Is this person qualified to give you advice? Would you take their advice on anything else? Are they projecting their fears on to you? Have they done anything bold and risky lately?
Train your brain to hear “maybe” instead of no: I have an aversion to the word no when we hear it as it relates to our hopes and dreams (but fully honor that no means no in other situations). Instead of taking the “no” as an ending point, hear it as a “maybe it’s time for something slightly different”. How can you tweak your approach to open more maybe or yes doors instead of being met by the big no door?
Find the limiting belief behind hearing no and stopping there: Have you ever heard the phrase “no means no and don’t ask me again” from a parent or guardian? I have and it taught me to stop at no. Once I uncovered that situational reaction (through lots of journaling and reflection) I realized I needed to recondition my response to hearing no. I had to do steps 1 and 2 repeatedly so that I didn’t let no stop me from chasing my dreams.
So, go get your millions and make little Regis proud by not letting “no” be your final answer.
Love,
Kelsey