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How did you resist the urge to check social media?
Deleting my social media apps was huge for me. I also had to delete other apps that I found myself habitually using (even though I was hardly using them before the sabbatical). It was also just long overdue for me so once I logged out I was ready to just be off. I also had to anchor in a lot of trust that if there was something “social” going on that I needed to know about, people would find a way to get a hold of me.
How did you fill your time you would have spent on social?
I am very protective of my time so this was a fun part of the sabbatical for me. At first, life didn’t feel all that different. I didn’t feel like I suddenly had hours back in my day. Even now, post-sabbatical, I don’t feel like I got any “time back” necessarily. I feel like what I got was more presence, awareness, and mental space. I am also very cool with doing nothing but if you’re one of those people who needs to be doing something… I’d say this could be a good opportunity to pick up a new habit, check some stuff off your to-do list or replace the habit with something else (i.e. reading, listening to podcasts, etc).
How did it work as a business owner? I want to be on less but I am my business…
Yeah, so from a business perspective I have the luxury of being a solopreneur. Target couldn’t just be like “BRB taking a social media sabbatical” because it would have major implications for their company. For me, and for what I do as a coach and a leader, I can’t serve from an empty cup. So, it made no difference in my business to take this break because I wasn’t even effective at what I was doing because I was so burnt out from it. It was scary to take a step back like this. I thought I’d get back on and everyone would have unfollowed me and forgot about me (wow anxiety and fears are THE WORST). It wasn’t the case. I was just as excited as my followers to be back in the game.
What about FOMO!?
In general, I don’t usually get FOMO. I’m very introverted aka a fan of social distancing before it was ~*cool*~. I will say though that the first platform I snuck a peek at (yes I did have a moment of weakness but it felt good so I went with it) was Facebook and it took me all of 3 minutes to get “caught up”. And you know what was the best part? Instead of having FOMO or living vicariously through other people’s lives, I was busy living my own life!
How did you stay ‘connected’ with friends/family who you might not talk to every day normally?
This is a great question. I didn’t really have a grand plan for this going into. I assumed I had everyone’s phone numbers that I would need in case anything urgent came up. I did ask a few Instagram friends for their cell phones before I went off so that I could still get a hold of them. For me, a big part of this break was going inward so I needed that distance to ensure I was really hearing my own voice and not relying on external voices. I did miss people a lot though!
How do I break the habit of checking my phone when I’m bored?
Let me start answering this one on my philosophical soapbox: The fact that we are creatures flying through space with so much privilege and advancement around us and we can get bored is beyond me. *Steps off*
I think first and foremost the fact that you are aware that you do this is a big part of the process. I would consider figuring out other habits or activities that can scratch that itch, especially in the beginning. Maybe you start doing puzzles to keep your hands busy or something like that. And kind of back to how this one started, maybe consider figuring out how/why you are bored when you are a uniquely magical being and capable of SO MUCH MORE than wasting time on social media?!
What if the people I’m with are constantly on their phones?
This one is the worst, right? Here you are trying to start a new habit and place some technology boundaries down and your roommates or significant others are just as obsessed with their phones and social media as you *used* to be. There are a few ways to approach this. First, you can call it out at the moment. *Hey! What’s going on in the internet land that’s so much more important than being here with me?* You can also request boundaries in advance *What do you think about no phones during shared meals?*. Another option is to just keep doing you. You are a leader. Others will follow along.
What if I need social media for work?
I am guessing you mean you need to keep up with trends, news, etc. or perhaps you manage social media for your job. Um, and it should be something that you do during work hours that they are paying you for. If your habit is bleeding outside of work hours, then you’re letting them get more from you than they are giving you. Looking at the financial lens of it may help break the habit or see new boundaries. Another thing I’ll add is that there’s a difference between mindlessly scrolling and using social media for work, ya know?
How did you feel on a soul level while off of social media?
I hadn’t thought about this until asked so THANK YOU. I immediately felt FREE. I felt like my life was mine to live and like I’d been released from the heavy chains around my heart and mind. Basically, amazing. My soul needed to recharge and heal without the constant battling of the external world (even though some of that battling is good! and entertaining!).
What are you applying from what you have learned?
Outside of my lessons learned, I’m mostly doing two things. One, using social media as a business owner from an intuitive place. Meaning, I know why I am showing up every day and what the purpose of my use of the apps are. Second, I am continuing to pay attention to my habits, usage, and how it is making me feel. I am not committing to any specific boundaries quite yet because I want to establish those naturally and again in intuitive alignment.
Additional Resources:
Books:
Usually, I rely on books to help me learn what I need to learn but this time I didn’t. However, here are a few books if you’re interested (these are blind recommendations - I haven’t read them):
How to Break Up With Your Phone by Catherine Price
24/6 by Tiffany Shlain
Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport
Smart Phone Dumb Phone by Allen Carr
Podcast:
That’s So Retrograde Ep. 275 “Tech Addiction SOS! With digital habits coach Tommy Sobel”
Services:
https://gobricknow.com